YES!

“Hello!”

“Hello! How are you?”

“I’m fine, thanks, how are you?”

“I’m ok, thank you.”

Everyone knows here it’s a normal format of the beginning of the conversation, or could also be the whole conversation, and even I can handle it. For now, although occasionally someone manages to confuse me by saying hi and ask if I’m ok, but not expecting me to really answer anything, leaving me alone with my monologue.

There are times when I do get this right, this – ‘hello, you’re alright?’ and I simply reply ‘hello’, smile, walk on and not reveal any further details of my life, but there are also other times when I figure it just meant a ‘hello’, but a hello-er keeps staring at me like I’d have to say something, confirm that I am ok or not too bad or just well. I haven’t discovered yet what’s the safest ground (or ‘the right thing to do’ as the previous PM would put it, despite of the fact that I can’t remember what were these right things he did… oh, well, I’m not getting into politics), instead I’ve started to muddle it all up myself, behaving exactly the same way (as my friends and acquaintances, not as this person mentioned previously).

This sort of (fake) politeness and pleasantries, querying about other people’s doings, is not that common in Estonia and it definitely does not take up any time when ringing to someone. Matt has told me that in the early days of our relationship he thought I was just being funny, answering the phone with a plain “Yes!” But obviously I wasn’t trying to be a comedian, I was just acting (not acting as an actress/comedian) how I was used to. He explained me that my norm was being considered rude in the UK and I had to follow his suit and start saying properly ‘hello’ (which I do now but occasionally find it, honestly, slightly pointless, unless I really feel rubbish or vice versa amazingly excellent and would like to express my non-average feelings to a person who’s asking about me).

Another rule to obey and a lesson I’ve learnt, is that it’s not advisable to write a letter, e-mail or a postcard in capital letters, because it would be shouting (unless of course, if you’re writing to someone with hard of hearing… sorry, I don’t think you should take this note seriously). But then again, that’s how in Estonia the children start learning letters, firstly capital letters, later the lowercase ones. So I guess a lot of Estonian literature for the youngest readers looks to an English-speaker like a constant shouting at a child.

And additionally on a similar note as this learning to read and write, reminded me of my own epic failure, and I find it’s worth reminding it to you too. So once I received a letter from a friend and as the Christmas was approaching rapidly I decided to send him a card, but I have this unfortunate habit of when I rush things I can be extremely forgetful, for example even forgetting a person’s name I’m about to send the card. To make sure I got the name correct, I checked the envelope with his details on. After posting the Christmas card, I went back home and then I realised my mistake – I’d named him Sendei following his handwriting which clearly read on the back of an envelope –  Sender: (and then his initial and surname).

Just FYI his name was Enock, which I’d actually been fully aware of before, and after, this little inaccuracy…